I have VERY weird dreams, and I sometimes remember them, sometimes not. Sean also has very funky dreams like his mom. Joe says he doesn't dream.
This morning, when my alarm went off at 5 am to run, I was actually GLAD to have woken up. Wait until you hear this dream (and I still remember it, too)....
In this dream, I found out that you can buy this CHINESE Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, and get a chinese baby. So, I was so excited, and I bought the box of Mac and Cheese. It looked just like the regular Mac and cheese. But, of course, come to find out, I could not eat the Mac and Cheese. I had to hire someone else to eat the Mac and Cheese to get my chinese baby. Well, the lady I hired decided she didn't want to give up the chinese baby. She was on an airplane (maybe coming back from China, I don't know, but she was OUTSIDE of the plane, riding on the wing, threatening to jump off if I took the baby. HOW BIZARRE IS THAT.
Then, 2 other kids that I know (one little girl I teach in Sunday school) and then John, my friends lil boy that she adopted from Columbia ) were there. I'm not sure why, because then my alarm went off.
HOW WEIRD IS THAT? You think that perhaps I have some anxiety about this process right now? LOL
I think it's that Karen is there now, meeting her son, Catalina and Calin met their son and daughter (SURPISE, THERE'S 2!), Sandi left today, and Shannon leaves tomorrow.
There's so much unknown about it all that sometimes I get freaked out, and scared. I'm scared to go, but yet I'm anxious to go. I want to know when, yet I'm scared to know when. I'm baby INSANE crazy, and I love to see my friends baby's and hug and kiss em.
Today, I was telling one of my friends about my dream. She was so sweet. She said, well if something happens and this Kaz thing doesn't work out, I will be a surrogate for you. BUT, it has to be your and Joe's stuff, then I won't be attached. I want you to get your baby.
:)
That was very sweet of her. I hope it doesn't come to that, as I don't think i could handle that anxiety either!
I'm off to read my latest book..Pillars of the Earth, by Ken Follett. My running buddies and I decided to be our own book club and read a book and then discuss it on our runs. It makes the miles FLY by. This is a book I would have NEVER picked up. It's over 900 pages, and it's set in the middle ages. Rough times, rough times-I would have NOT dug being a chick back then. Ick! It's pretty dark, and at times so violent (which I really abhor violence), but it's a good story. One of my running friends dreamed she was starving, and cold and wet. NOt me, I dream about Magic Chinese Mac and Cheese to get a chinese baby, then the "adoption" falling thru where the lady wants to jump off the wing of a plane in flight.
LOL
What would I do without my blogger friends? I don't know. :) I'm glad I don't have to find out.
Sandi is en route to Paris right now. I think she is just 4 hours away.
So excited for her. :)
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20 comments:
That is one crazy dream - Mac & Cheese and a little girl from China. An interesting combination. I think it is so funny that you had to get someone else to eat the Mac & Cheese (adoption agency?).
I love "Pillars of the Earth." I read it years ago and it made such an impression on me. I loved the history & the interwoven stories were great. Scott gave me the sequel, but I have not started it yet.
The unknown does get to you, no doubt about that. It is giving me gray hair and TMJ.
Hang in there . . .
I've only had one anxiety dream so far. I hope they don't start coming in droves as we get closer. My dreams can be every bit as freaky as your mac n cheese one, so I can only imagine!
Sounds like an interesting book! I started a book club with my girlfriends years ago, and really need to start it up again. It's such a great way to have girl time and also encourage you to read outside your comfort zone.
Sweet dreams!
Regina
Okay, that is really funny. I'll take a box of magic mac & cheese
:-) Although at this point, Adam might kill me if I try to eat some of your magic stuff!
At least your "anxiety" dreams are laughable rather than super stressful.
So funny. I think it is normal to start having crazy dreams. I sure had them. Hang in there...your time is coming!!!
Susan, I've had an adoption anxiety dream twice now... 2 versions of the same dream, months apart... where I travel to a foreign country, sit down in the orphanage director's office, and she says "Are you ready to meet your child?" When I say yes, in walks an kid that looks to be 18,19,20 years old...(once it was a girl, once a boy). I express some surprise, but the director says "This is your child!" So I say okay, feeling really disappointed that I've just met this great kid who will immediately leave and go to college. :^) I've always chalked it up to the fact that I teach college... the 18-22 year old age group is one I"m really familiar with now. Maybe that's how I'm defining "kid" in my subconscious!
Though sometimes dreams are just dreams, I thought your's was really interesting! I am also going to run it by my husband who is an excellent dream interpreter so you might get two posts from me.
I think Mac & Cheese represents home-comfort-family -kids- America. You know you are adopting internationally so it makes sense to me that you needed an international version and Chinese is about the most international it gets to Americans.
Perhaps your anxiety is about the whole process. I see the woman you hired as the adoption agency which is in control at this point with all kinds of great unknowns for you. BUT the plane is MOVING and she is on the outside. Since you haven't met your baby yet, it is natural that your mind would place the baby outside the plane with the agency. Your anxiety is that she might jump with your baby.
NOW - this fear is all so normal (and creative!). Just take a deep breath and say "this is just a dream. the agency is HELPING me get my baby - but wow am I creative!" It is just natural fears percolating up the unconcious.
All is well. Sending you a hug.
Ok seriously I can not stop laughing. That is truly a crazy anxiety filled dream.
Hang in there my friend it will happen and you will think you are ready and then you will so wish you had just one extra day. So spend time with sean and joe cause your life is gonna get crazier.
Sandi
That is SO normal! Don't worry! As you get closer to travel they will probably be more frequent and intense, like mine were, but not to worry, everyone will go through it. I frequently dreamt that Noah was sick and I could not get him any medicine.
Pillars was such a good book. I finished it a month ago and loved it. I am so excited to read Angela's comment that there is a sequel, I am definitely getting it! It really is a good story, all the way until the end. I wish it was a movie.
Totally normal. I kept having weird anxiety dreams while in Kaz. I didn't "breathe" until we had Serik with us in the apartment and even then, I let out a huge sigh of relief getting on the plane.
A couple of more thoughts - didn't you have weird dreams when you were pregnant? If you did, here are your pregnancy dreams. I swear, this IS just like pregnancy. My mind has been so scattered!
The sequel to "Pillars of the Earth" is "World Without End". William is evil - get used to it. The ending is good, so push on!
Hey, girlfriend. You win the cake on that weird dream, and I think it has to be a Cheese Cake with a fortune cookie on top!
I can't believe the other FL S's - all of them - Sandi, Shannon, and Saren are in or enroute to Kaz except for us. Okay and the lovely Kaz moms who have not submitted their dossiers yet.
We shoudl go grab a cup of coffee while they're gone. Maybe buy some baby presents for them. Let me knwo when is good with you. And if you want to have some Mac and Cheese for lunch, I won't let you.
Sounds like your fears are coming together at once in your subconscious: fear of not finding familiar food in Kaz, fear of something going wrong in the process, fear of flying old Russian airplanes.... I hear you on the anxiety - I seem to fluctuate between excitement and joy and sheer terror (both at the unknown part of the process as well as the thought of becoming a parent for the first time). I guess all we can do is just take a deep breath and dive right in!
I love "Pillars of the Earth." Great book! I am totally into the books that are set back in that time, but I agree- some of the violence is a little too much.
Your dream is pretty crazy! I remember having those types of dreams too back then. Oh man. The way the brain takes reality and twists it is so interesting to me. One time I discovered that if I ate a chocolate from a particular box of chocolates right before bed, I'd have the FREAKIEST dreams! (No, there was nothing in the chocolates!) I would "take" one every night just to see what distorted paths my brain would take each night. All too soon I ran out!
Hey! I get crazy dreams when I eat chocolate, and then I go to www.dreamdoctor.com and look up the symbols in my dreams.
I got that book too but keep pushing it off to read much smaller ones. I just bought a whole bunch of books from the FedEx salvage store next door. Ask me what I think about that book in like 4 years, haha.
Hang in there Ma; if worse comes to worse, you can borrow my uterus, cuz that's the kind of step-daughter I am.
xoxo
I'm sure you'll never look at Mac & Cheese the same again :)
Yep, your anxiety is coming through in your dreams. I can't say when those funky dreams will pass....maybe when you finally get home with your little one?
We're in this together because I'm having some very vivid and funky dreams too!
Hang in there,
Eileen
Hey that www.dreamdoctor.com site is pretty cool. did you check it out? I think your riding on the wing of a rickety old plane is pretty accurate for a dream these days!
I hope your anxiety subsides. If it doesn’t, though, at least your blog followers can enjoy reading about your interesting dreams!
I have frequent and unusual dreams, too. Maybe I am anxious about Roxana teething because I've had a few dreams about it, but they're not as weird as my typical dreams, which are quite inexplicable. In Kaz, I dreamed that Roxana got her first tooth but that the baby house had crowned it in gold. Roxana looked like a baby gangsta, and I was really mad. I figured that the baby tooth would fall out eventually and was comforted. I think this dream was brought about by the fact that our driver had gold teeth and the fact that the baby house just does some weird things (like UV treatment for a sniffle). Last night, I dreamed that I gave Roxana a pill to help a tooth come in, but all of her teeth came in at once, and she looked really weird. Then, the teeth all retracted, and she was toothless once again.
Okay. I had to laugh at your dream but please know I am not discounting your anxiety as travel comes closer. I think it is the thought of magic Mac n Cheese to get your baby:) If it were only that easy, right? Not sure I will look at it the same way!
As everyone has already said, crazy dreams like that are totally normal as life changing events come nearer. I always have weird dreams before big "things" happen! Hang in there and don't disect the dreams too much:) Hopefully travel day is coming soon!!!
Totally weird dream! I must agree that you might just have a bit (just a tad) bit of anxiety right now. :) All will go well, you will be blessed as I have been, and no hungry Chinese lady full of Mac and Cheese will jump from the wing of your plane. I promise! :)
Christy
Your craziness is quite normal. My first three nights here in Uralsk I went into panic attacks and crying fits. Pacing the floor, I was freaking out. Bad thoughts racing through my head: I won't be able to bond with this child; I'd be a terrible mom; I'm too old to be a mom; this adoption is going to put us in the poor house, I can't commit to this child; is this the right child or is there a better one?, etc., etc. Finally when we made the decision, all my anxieties melted away.
You'll do great. I'll be your biggest cheerleader back home when you're over here. Hang in there.
Big hugs,
Karen
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