I found this note on my laptop this morning. Sean made me a card. It was hard to capture it in the picture , but it melted my heart. My boy sure knows how to make his mommy cry. :)
I wanted to take a moment and thank everyone for all the nice comments and emails that I've received since hearing the news that perhaps any adoptive parent over 50 can kiss their Kaz kid dream "adieu". I was really touched by the outpouring of support. I received another email this morning from my agency that assured us that since our dossier is already out of the embassy, and thru the MOE, that our journey is not affected. However, really, one never knows. I'm not sure why it happened to the poor other couple, and my heart goes out to them as well. Rumors are that this law is expected to pass this time, although, some of said, not until November. I'm not ready to exhale yet, nor will I until we're home with the Kaz kid in the ergo.
All the love and support I felt truly helped me get thru a rough time. I am so thankful and incredibly grateful for my loving family and community. I am focusing on the things in my life that I can control, and I have many of those. That being said, Sean had a half day at school on Monday. He has been working SO VERY HARD at school so we played hookey (I told his teacher on Friday) and spent the day in the most magical place on earth. Sean really "stepped it up" this weekend. He got his entire state report typed on my laptop (2 hours on Saturday, and 6 hours on Sunday). He worked on his speech in the car on the way, and his math and spelling on the way home. I was so very impressed with his dedication to the cause. :)
We had a FANTASTIC DAY together. He is just a delightful blessing in my life. We have our "Disney routine" which starts with egg mcmuffin's for breakast the McDonald's drive thru. We encountered much larger crowds at the park then we are used to, but that didn't phase our good moods. Whenever Sean saw lil kids crying, he'd look at me and say "How can these kids be crying--they're at DISNEY!!" It was so funny. We were in line for Splash Mountain and a lil boy behind us was jumping up and down, like Tigger. Sean looked at me and whispered in my ear "I think he has to go the bathroom." I cracked up. The lil boy's mom got a kick out of that too. Nope, no potty dance, just a very excited 4 year old. :)
Don't get me wrong, I would LOVE a kiddo from Kaz to love, BUT, if it decided that that is not in the cards for us, then I cannot "cry over spilled milk." I am truly blessed with a wonderful son, a generous and loving stepdaughter (who offered to be our surrogate if Kaz fell thru, amazing offer..) and a great stepson. I have a wonderful husband who supports me unconditionally.
I would like another child to love. I think another child would be fun to bring into our family. If she or he is not from Kaz, then I hear there are thousands of kids right in Florida who need parents.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for everyone's wonderful thoughts and prayers. They are TRULY felt.
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19 comments:
Everything will work out however it is supposed to. In the meantime, I am glad you are counting your blessings- you do have a lot! Sean is a riot :-) What a great kid. And there is another child out there somewhere who will be a wonderful addition to the Serra family. Just a question of when. Be patient (I know, easier said than done!) it will all work out.
Sending lots of hugs your way :-)
You are so right. count your blessings! You really are inspiring.
That card was so sweet! Oh! What a great kid. I am so glad that you got away to Disney. It always helps me to step out of my brain by doing something. This last weekend I worked outside Sunday afternoon and it felt so good.
I second Sara - you will find your baby!
Unfortunately too many of us know how difficult the process can become, and while no two journeys are ever the same, the one constant seems to be the payoff for keeping the journey alive.
Find the inspiration wherever you can and continue to follow you desire. She's out there. Lots of love from Maine.
What a great kid you have! And a great mother you are! As I mentioned in the note before, don't write Kaz off yet until all of the cards are counted. Though I understand that it's hard not to feel like you're on a rollercoaster (I tell myself to not get worked up over stuff but...). I'll join you in holding our collective breaths until we all get our LOIs and return with our children. Perhaps we need to have some exhaling celebration or ritual to look forward to - any ideas?
Do you know how jealous I am that you can just take a half way and go to Disney! That is freakin awesome! I am so excited to go next weekend, I can't stand it.
Breathe in, breathe out - God is on your side!
Kim
Glad you got out and had some FUN with Sean. Disney is the best! I agree with Kelly on the exhaling celebration/ritual...I think we are all holding our breath. It will be a great thing when we can all give that collective sigh of relief, God willing.
And keep counting those blessings, Susan! It sounds like you are surrounded by the most loving, generous and caring family members anyone could ask for.
And seriously, don't give up on Kaz yet. There is still LOTS of hope! Perhaps the other couple had some other factors working against them that we are not aware of. You just never know about these things, and the fickle Kaz government.
Your daughter is out there. She is going to find her way to you, one way or another!
The rent for my uterus is too expensive anyways :) it's a hot property yanno!
You know I love you and would do anything for our family.
Oh, and when's the next Disney trip, I think I'm going to have a "cold" that day.
Love you much.
So Foxy mom had fun again at Disney! Susan, you are so great! I am always impressed with your positive atitude and I always thought good things happen to optimistic people. Best thing to do, concentrate on people you love and who care about you. I think Sean`s letter is everything what you needed for now, while waiting for your Kaz cutie. No need to give up your dream so easily, your dossier is in MOE and this is a matter of time for you to go to Kaz. If not, as you said, anywhere else there are many children who need love.
Many hugs
PS. I am waiting for my children to come home and most likely in November we will organize a trip to Disney. I am not sure about them, but can`t wait :). I can`t wait to meet with Florida mommies and children, Alexa, HB and EB, and of course your daughter. If Sandi`s daughter will not be there yet, I might need to plan a second trip.
Have I said that Sean is awesome? We are still praying for you and know that you will meet your daughter wherever she is. Hopefully it is Kaz - you have one cool rug, afterall :)
You have an awesome attitude and perspective - keep the faith and holding on when days are challenging & the wait is hard.
Susan, I am praying, praying, and praying some more for you and your adoption plans. You've been such a cheerleader to all of us out here in blogland. I hope we can all return the favor to you during what I hope are the last few weeks of your wait!
And by the way, Sean is such a great kiddo, and he's an AWESOME big brother already, and the little one isn't even home yet. He's totally cut out for big-brothering. Sean, you rock!!!
I just got caught up on what is going on. I am at a loss as to what to say right now, but I am thinking about you and sending lots of positive energy your way. You have your usual upbeat attitude about the situation, and are an ispiration. And as for your son - what a gem he is!! You are incredibly blessed with him and I have no doubts that there is another child out there for you to love (whether in Kaz or not). You are a great mom and a wonderful person! Hang in there!! Glad to hear you had a great time at Disney (I wish my parents played hookey with me - you are the coolest mom ever!!)
Susan,
I totally missed the whole thing - what a horribly scary thing that they might pass that dumb law. We are SO hoping that your dossier goes through and you end up adopting - but your attitude is AMAZiNG. You have the most incredible way of looking at life. I wish you could bottle it. We are sending our love.
J & M
I really loved Sean's card. It would have brought tears to my eyes :) Super that you were able to get away and have some family time at Disney!
I wish you well with Kaz! I have not lost hope on this for you yet. I see that you are working through the emotions.
Take care,
Eileen
Oh wow, you have such wonderful children! Wonderful, kind, giving kids (though I suppose Jillian is an adult!).
You have such a positive outlook even when the chips are down. It's one of the things I love about you most- one of the things I respect the most. You truly are a remarkable woman. They say that the wife/woman is the glue that holds a family together and keeps it strong. It's no wonder you have such an amazing, loving, and generous family with you as that glue.
I wish I could be there to give you a big hug.
Lots of love.
I already wrote....but just stopped by again to say hello :)
Eileen
Great attitude!!! Any child would be so lucky to join your family whether from Kaz or not! Great idea to worry about things you can control.
You're in my prayers!!!
I am thinking of you and praying for you. I hope hope hope hope this happens. I want you to know you are a great mother and a great friend and I can't wait to meet you when we do the florida trip when Matt and Suz are home...and you guys too.
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